Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
No, we ended up finding him drunk at a bus stop downtown sitting on the bench asking people for chocolates and amazing stories to "rid his mind of his whore of a girlfriend"
just did awkward shuffle by the bagels in the dining hall at 7:30 AM with a kid i've hooked up with. goodbye freshman year.
He asked me why my bellybutton was so ugly... and wondered why i wasnt in the mood anymore.
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
Can u please come get me. My car keys are gone. Somehow I ended up sleeping in my trunk
"drunk introduce yourself to everyone colleen" came out last night... you kept grabbing guys faces that you just met and just kept saying their names over and over and over again so you wouldn't forget.. then would see them 5 minutes later to introduce yourself again..
Embrace your curves. Cuz we're too poor for a coke habit.
Also, nothing screams "don't talk to me because I'm unstable" like walking around eating cookie dough out of the package.
i made this one couple from ohio so uncomfortable that they left....and that was WHEN I HAD PANTS ON
Still stoned. I like your bong. It can stay. No others, though.
Btw, you're my emergency contact at Planned Parenthood
Usually it's tequila, or vodka. But today was just the devil
How did i spend $200 last night?
Every time you went to get me a drink, you also came back with shots. Then you fell down the steps.
Randomize
