I'm so never shaving my vag in a target bathroom for him again.
I wish there was a hungover fairy to brush my teeth and bring me a diet coke.
Does it make me a prostitute if I accepted a Life House concert ticket for giving this guy head?
No. It just means your good at giving head.
I think the taxi driver just requested me on facebook..... his name was george right?
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
We ended not having sex. I didn't want to explain that I was wearing a Unitard because all my socks and underwear were dirty.
his finger was half off and he was more concerned that he wasnt at home shooting cucumbers out of his potato gun.
Is it bad I'm drunk at orientation
You've been there for 12 hours, what are you supposed to be doing
Not be drunk
I have feelings that need drinking.
Just assume that every drink in that house has alcohol in it.
this hospital has no fireball
i want george washington to fuck me as hard as he can holy shit
Ahha guy saw me buying beer, went "hmmmmm" and nodded his head approvingly. No words exchanged, but he has made his way to my heart haha
her and her boyfriend kept giving me coke ad kissing me talking about my awesome boobs
Randomize
