it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
im typing and i feel like my hands are on backwards.
Stop texting me, I'm right here.
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
I don't want to tell anyone! People who sleep with senators either end up in porn or guantanamo
Will the fact that I have 4 boob hickies add to or take away from tonight's outfit?
I want to play lord of the rings tonight. And by that I mean get really drunk, potentially lost, and go trekking through the woods or climbing shit. I want all of you there. You are the fellowship. This is a mass text. I am insanely high.
I have learned that if you don't want to hook up with the guy who walked you home, food is great compensation.
He added his name to my To Do list. That's the way to my Type A heart.
the evidence suggests last night I either took a bath in beer or drank 18 beers while in the bath. either one sounds good to me. sad i don't remember it
You just put lesbians and Hogwarts in the same sentence. Of course I'm in.
Oh like it's the first time I've had a bowl of wine
she just sent our roommates a message asking them for a parakeet. are you gonna call later?
I saw some guy masturbating in the Burger King parking lot and I’m just fucking done
That ass isn’t going to eat itself.
Randomize
