dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
the women in the ladies room did not appreciate my innovation of turning a sink into a urinal
you told me heaven would be the 3 of us at Moe's forever and every hot girl that walked in would ask us to play stone face
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
No, seriously, 1.5 gallons of sangria plus two days of untapped cock. Waiting here. For you.
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
Apparently she saw two women get in a slapping match over a comforter at target yesterday. She said it was awesome. Clearly I take after her.
He just tagged everyone he's slept with this year in a 'memories of 2011' tweet
She started howling at the moon. That was pretty much the deal breaker.
Lets get coked out and steal a parrot this summer
him and the cab driver we buy e from got into a fist fight, about which show is better, futurama or family guy.
So his shoes are still here. And there are three contacts in a case. And a shirt on the bed. I've checked my dorm and he's not here. I'm so confused.
Lock the bathroom door next time you are going to masterbate with the shower head, okay?
I was just power-washing my vagina.
Have you ever been up at one in the morning and thought to yourself, "I do not know nearly enough about penguin reproduction"?
Randomize
