I just realized i haven't had sex in 2009. oh man thats embarrassing.
I wonder if you could grow some weed in a chia pet
I love how my brain works. It's like being on drugs without the costly upkeep.
I looked at him all bewildered and he said, "what? I figured if it was under 30 seconds it'd be free."
If she wants to think that freshman 15 means sleeping with 15 guys than so be it I just gotta make sure I'm one of them.
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
At 4 am, making my walk of shame, the hotel security followed me to my car with his flashlight shined directly on me. I felt like either a criminal or like I was about to get raped. Can't a girl sneak out of a hotel room without an actual spotlight on her?!?!?!
So how exactly do I backtrack from motorboating and ass grabbing?
We should. Taco Bell definitely gives me the shits though.
It's girls night. No shame, just febreeze
We were having a serious discussion about Blue's Clues and I just kept thinking, 'you've seen me naked'.
Yeah he drove 30 minutes at 3 AM to come fuck me in my neighbors treehouse
this is a PSA to never have sex in a bed from ikea
just realized I'll be in a check out line with just Hershey syrup and condoms. I don't know if I am setting a good image for our generation
I'm pmsing pretty hard.. .just cried 3 times while eating a Hershey bar dipped in peanut butter
I remember her making the first martini but the rest of the weekend is a blur of vodka, high heels and sex toys.
First time being used by a cougar. Definitely okay with it
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