I mean don't get me wrong, vaginas are terrifying, they look so sneaky with all their layers and secret compartments and trap doors
i actually looked down at my cock today and said "whoa buddy, you need a haircut....(grimace) and a shower"
took 5 apple pie shots. caution: flames. not digestable.
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
Her friend drew me a diagram of how we could get away with her giving me a blowjob at work.
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
He upper decked the toilet, got himself lit on fire 6 times and lit 4 other people on fire in the course of 3 days.
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
This might be the most awkward night of my life. And I had someone pee on me once.
Wow. This hand sanitizer smells awesome. It's like I just gave a handjob to a fruit basket.
Oh just chilling alone with a stranger baby while everyone else clambakes the bathroom. Probation is the reason there is bad things in the world.
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
your were asleep with people making out on top of you. you didn't even look bothered by it.
He plays D&D and his dick should be carved out of marble. I think I'm in love.
So do I get points for screwing my recently single ex boyfriend and then telling him to go fight for his ex back?
Randomize
