when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
Walk of Shame. In a state park.
why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
Went home with a guy 2 " his house". Woke up this morn on couch to parents cooking breakfast, piss all over my back and he is no where to be found. That fuckr pissed on me and bounced. His parents are gonna think some drunk bitch pissed their couch.
standing in line at subway, they've got 'stand up and get crunk' blaring. the lines out the door and everyone is dancing. Lombardi Gras rules.
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
I'm cooking a can of baked beans on the baseboard heater. It is too early in the semester to be this poor.
His fuck buddy just got fake tits and wants him to 'come break them in.' I need his life.
There's something odd about buying beer for the first time while wearing my school sweater from kindergarten, but I don't mind.
I'm okay. We got a prayer rug sent to us with the face of jesus on it. From Tulsa Oklahoma. Kinda weird.
I fell on my face, puked, and had to be rocked to sleep in a hammock. I'd say Europe is a success
I'm not gonna swipe right, he has better hair than me. Just no.
I literally have a pirate chest of slutty clothing.
Hangover and judgement, the breakfast of champions.
I kinda just want to steal him and keep him forever
Randomize
