Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
As soon as he told me I had a 'pretty laugh' I knew I'd be putting out more than I had originally planned.
Just ran interference for her again. Sometimes i wonder how many times in my life i'll have to be a cock block at the clinic
his grandma walked in on us. twice. and he was truly fucking surprised when i put my pants back on.
I'm really proud of myself for not blacking out yet this weekend!
It's a Thursday.
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.
That idiot. I'll see him on campus and he'll try and touch me like we're friends or some shit. 1.you're ugly 2. You dropped the blunt in the pool
Ended up getting hot boxed in a limo with a bunch of asians going to a karaoke bar. I think I pretended to understand their language for a solid hour. Am I bilingual now?
Well I just had a 45 minute conversation with a lady who was drunk off her ass complaining about how her 3 sons won't talk to her anymore. No more dive bars.
Im so glad I make morally wrong decisions. It's like the best worst thing I've ever done.
Saw throw up in the parking lot at work, glad I'm not the only one. But now the search begins.
Mary's wearing shades at her desk, brilliant!
I guess I’m only into threesomes at Halloween, because I just woke up next to “Marilyn Monroe” and “Joe DiMaggio” in their condo
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