bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
At least you weren't that one girl in the bar that was letting everyone draw on her in sharpie. Worst decision I've ever witnessed.
He's warming up to shark week, by only eating fish and drinking vodka, and all the time he keeps yelling "death to the seals!"
He came out in cowboy boots and underpants holding a beer while he hugged my mom. I love Montana.
Sometime between a drunk guy asking me if I'm a Beach person or a lake person WHILE HIS HAND WAS IN HIS FUCKING PANTS or breaking up a lady fight over peewee football league I started to reevaluate my life and self
He told me the escort brought him pizza. Can something be sad and awesome at the same time ?
All i really wanna do tonight is get drunk with you and dance on tables. is that too much to ask?
Thanks, girl! That means a lot. I can't wait to share my jail stories with you over salad and cupcakes.
i miss freshman lecture halls much harder to take shots in a class of 20
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
I took my makeup off with mouthwash. Seemed like a good idea. It worked.
He wants me to fart in his mouth and is offering me SOOOO much coke. I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place. GIVE ME ADVICE.
you thought the best thing to say to him was "you aint no fuckin cop"
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