So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
I just mistook a monk for someone with the newest colored snuggie.
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
I cannot remember December 31 for the past 3 years. it might as well not even exist on my calendar anymore
Oh my god. I think I just sexted my mom...
What?!
Fwd: Ride me, you sleek sleek woman!!!
if we break up, blackout me is coming back, making out with everything in sight
No fucking idea. Just paid for my chipotle in chocolate coins, though. Either there is a huge language barrier happening here, or my big boobs are finally paying off.
lets just say that i have already today: gotten drunk, got in a fight, got stranded an hour away from home, found a ride, sobered up, and slept. woken back up, and here i am. its been a long day. Day drinking is bad for friendships.
Dude, he threw a pool chair off of an 8 story building. It was a successful night I'd say.
Annnnd I didn't even notice there is a guy dancing in a jock strap beside me. That explains girls smiling at me
Just went trick or treating in my kitchen. Found chocolate and scotch. Happy fucking Halloween
We got drunk and crashed a fifty year old woman's birthday party for the food. Whoops.
You having your own car has severely reduced the amount of blowjobs I get.
I don't WANT a sex disease! Especially one assigned to me by my supervisor..
There is a moment when you wake up with a butt plug in when you question your choices in life.
There is also a moment when you wake up in a kiddie pool of jello cubes where you question what the fuck you did last night. Are you still in the attic or did you go home.
Randomize
