you better believe me or I'll punch you in the face
she looked like the before picture.
His sex texting was like a step by step guide to the most boring sex ever...
Just got the American Express annual summary for 2009. The amount of bars we visited last year is impressive.
those are the first brownies ive had since i was 13 that didnt have weed in them.
Just threw up in the garbage can outside the liquor store... I'm pretty sure that's some sort of distress signal.
I'm sitting in the corner at the bar with a poolstick in case a brawl breaks out. Some crazy shit is going down and I'm trying to show my feathers like a horny peacock.
Indeed. Apparently I called my sisters and told them I wouldn't get arrested because it's not a real sword.
Would it be wildly inappropriate for me to tailgate a Jonas brothers concert?
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
It's gotten to the point that when I close my eyes to cum all I see is candy crush
He also deemed that the fact that I couldn't log into Netflix was not an emergency. He's wrong.
So my family just woke up on Easter morning and shared a bowl. That's bonding😊
You shouted "my financial aid just came in, who wants a shot?!" Half the bar followed
MANIFESTATION IS REAL AND IM GETTING LAID TONIGHT
Randomize
