imagine a blue Jetta with an ILLINOIS license plate that read JISLORD..... upon pondering it for 10minutes I came to the conclusion that J stood for JESUS and IF the license plate had enough room it would read "Jesus Is Lord"
no i did not stop my best friend from eating out my sister...bros before hoes
I FOUND THE PROF I'M GOING TO FUCKKKK.
sperm doesn't mix with malibu too well
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I know this is weird, but can you ask your girlfriend if she has my mailbox?
Seriously?
100%
Fun Fact: The stage were about to graduate on is where we once drove a van and kidnapped someone.
Fun Fact 2: My parents are sitting by the bushes I peed in this weekend.
yeah that always happens. i'm like the where's waldo of parties. i never even know where the fuck i'm at.
It'll be like a meth lab. But with jello.
She just threw the soap bottle at me from the ladie's room and keeps asking me when we left the bar and got on the boat.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want to jump into a ballpool of dicks now.
I think he just tried to put your boyfriend in a trashcan....
Hey by the way did you notice my third nipple in my snapchat
Cancun blessed me with a drinking problem
Nothing says "I'm sorry for shitting in your bed" like an Olive Garden gift card
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
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