Today I ate a sandwich and half my molar fell off, feels like a semi sprayed into my jaw.
I wish i was spraying into your jaw.
just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
So we sucessfully lit our bathtub on fire. Thought you should know.
I know we didn't hook up because i was still wearing my fanny pack in the morning
its like she was born with a silver dick in her mouth
Some drunk couple just made out on the sidewalk and it reminded me some sweet moments we have shared...
i licked the inside of a toilet bowl for $14. i really can't talk about my night.
I feel like I had a lobotomy last night. I blacked out. Did we try to stick my Penis in a beer bottle?
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
You're right. Single life welcomed me back with open arms. It's like it knew it wasnt going to be long when I left.
Is buying her a loofah for my house commitment like? I don't wanna give the wrong idea
Dude imagine how many pictures of dicks Obama gets. That can't be unusual. Almost every kids in the US has written the president a letter.
I think it's god's punishment for my behavior in Vegas . Lies were told. Angels were defiled. Pools were pissed in
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
Home-made laxative recipe: activia yogurt and tequila shots. Any ratio ought to work.
Randomize
