Apparently he's never heard a queef, he totally thought I farted and got freaked out.
operation "beaches make me wet" is a go
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
i had to cut you off after you shoved a bunch of bottle caps in your mouth and pretended you had braces.
Just so we're clear. I'm still making jello shots and bringing them to the bar in my purse. I don't care if its half off margaritas. Don't want anyone thirsty
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
I'm a gymnast. they should know better than to let me get dunk near anything i can flip on
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
There's no time frame.
For drinking wine out of the bottle and taking nyquil at 9 AM? There probably should be.
I'm sorry I was just sleeping on the kitchen floor I'm too dead to think
It's something you'd find in the room outside of Ben Carson's sex dungeon
I was afraid I was gonna get a URI, so I peed on his front porch.
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
you can see where the duct tape was on my nipple
He told me he would make me come so hard I would throw up. I'm actually horrified that he thinks that's something any person would want
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