shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
New high or new low? Cat walked into the bathroom while I was taking a #2, looked @ me, sneezed and walked out..
Why are we friends again?
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
no. you can't hotbox the world.
she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
I am getting my wife a tattoo just above her butthole that says, "For entry just add tequila."
Missing a small section of hand. Hope your night is going better
thanks for celebrating my birthday so severely 2 years ago. i just found your hospital discharge papers in my closet.
anything for my little brother.
It's home.......I'm going to the store in disguise to get skittles and cake frosting. Then I'll eat the frosting in a dark corner while I cry and wonder what I did to deserve this.
You kept saying you only wanted to drink until you were sleepy. You succeeded if "sleepy" means you sleepied around with 4/6 of the guys there.
I'm wearing a dinosaur hat bikini cone bra over my shirt. So good things are happening
You took off all your clothes to try on her fur coat and then punched me when I said you couldn't wear it to bed.
I genuinely attribute some of my blowjob skills to playing saxophone in highschool
I haven't had a bra on since I quit my job.
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
Randomize
