? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
He would stand there for a few seconds with a blank look on his face then randomly start running full sprint towards macdonalds. We'd catch him and he'd promise to stop so we'd let him go and he'd do it again.
Right now I can't do anything that will ban me from donating plasma. That is a legit source of income for me.
I feel like today should be a " im going to have sex with you cause its raining and theres nothing else to do" kinda day
Hey, 'thunder cock' as proud as I am for you getting laid, could you put a muzzle on her? I have to be up at 5, thanks.
He sent me a picture of his dick with a cowboy hat on it.
I had to jump out of her car while it was moving enough said
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
We finally have the house to ourselves and your out playing Lance Fucking Armstrong
I know now that the cab driver can get me a 10 dollar blow job. I'm practically a local.
Seriously dude...who threw up on Michelle? She's been crying for like an hour
I've also stopped shaving, like, everything. I can't tell if I'm empowered or sad
Me: I shouldn't go to the airport bar it's too expensive and I don't need it. Dark me: SHOTS AT 7 AM
Had sex on the beach last night with a drug dealer. win-win-win situation
I WILL KICK YOU IN THE FUCKING THROAT IF YOU EAT MY FUCKING ICE CREAM.
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