Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(214): View more from Texas

apparentely "Beer Pong Champ" is not a profession, no wonder they havent called me back......

(817): View more from Texas

told ya

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(832): View more from Houston, Texas

i was so high that i was eating crumbs of my bed only to realize they were fuzz thingies. fml.

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(812): View more from Indiana

I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.

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(+61): View more from Australia

I can't in good conscience help you bag a Catholic girl who isn't at least a 7.

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Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
Read it at the TFLN blog
(580): View more from Oklahoma

true friends will drive 3 hours to come smoke a couple blunts with you on the bridge where your car broke down

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(503): View more from Oregon

Dude she broke four ribs, how does a 110 lb girl break four of my ribs during sex?! It hurts so bad but was so worth it

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(561): View more from Florida

Just had a shirt made that says "I'm sorry" going to wear it every sat and sun morning for the foreseeable future

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(519): View more from Ontario

How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things

(1-519): View more from Ontario

I felt like I was at the zoo

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(724): View more from Pennsylvania

I'll never lecture you, go get that dick baby girl make momma proud,I didn't raise no quitter

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