This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
Do you think unemployment will give me a christmas bonus?
Dude you didn't move for like 2 hours then suddenly sang the chorus to ghetto superstar and passed back out
Passing out during sex is actually quite pleasant. its like being rocked to sleep with a penis
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Please tell me this is my four loko that I just woke up in....
You owe me $8 for the carwash I needed after you threw the salmon on my windshield.
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
Just had a heart to heart with my John Belushi poster.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just woke up from quarter beer tuesdays wearing 3 pairs of underwear, none of which are the ones I left wearing...2 Around my waist and one around my shoulder in an attempt at a bra. At least drunk me tries to be decent?
I'm currently eating a turkey dinner, listening to xplosive by dr. Dre, and drinking rum. Hispanic christmas dinners are the best.
if you fuck our toilet off the wall again, i'm going to be so mad.
SCOTCH AND CIGARS AT THE TITTY BAR. YOU ARE COMING WITH US.
He stole me a cantaloupe and we drunkenly broke into a park and ate it on a bench with my pocket knife. I think i need to marry him
I remember the Prince Albert and the three penises in the threesome. But the rest no.
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