You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
well most of my day revolves around power hour
I spent all night sexting your girlfriend for you because you were too drunk. You're welcome.
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
I was high enough to think that mac-n-cheese w/ ketchup, tortilla chips w/ ketchup, and milk was a fancy dinner
You me handle of captain and a sorostitute study sesh, if we don't get laid mancards must be relinquished
Shame?!? Shame only comes from getting naked in front of strangers and it not being awesome
All I remember is sitting on your kitchen floor and playing with a banana like it was a viking ship.
The worst part about living in a small town is partying with your pharmacist and then having to buy Plan B from him the next morning.
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
sidebar: i fucked your brother last night
I should become a firefighter. Who uses his cock to fight fires. Like a Superhero.
I feel like my life just hangs in the balance of "Yeah I'm probably not doing this right"
she said she doesn't remember seeing me at all last night. ...I was with her for six hours, there's no way she could have been blackout the whole time
It's sunday night and I just went to the store to buy cookie dough and condoms, I'm so proud of myself.
Randomize
