So I went on a date with this girl...and whos our waitress? My girlfriend got a second job she didn't tell me about to afford my bday present.
I dont know whether to be proud of myself for not driving, or being proud that i was so messed up I couldnt drive
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
Well look at it this way, if he should happen to get into a terrible accident within the next 2 days, its okay.. i have his dental records on my ass cheek.
I know. You don't know poor life choice until your sitting on the floor of a community bathroom waiting to vomit at 4 am
I dunno, but she kept buying me shots and asking me to go places with her. oh btw we're signed up to go bungee jumping Saturday
I hope you realize that its not me making that decision, but rather the combination of my genitals and sexual orientation
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
I'm attracted to him because he looks like the kind of guy who would lick my asshole without me having to ask.
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
Just got recognized as black out drunk girl. I'm never going to live that down, am I?
There will be plenty of opportunity for me to sexualize Mike via VenMo.
Randomize
