The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
Phrase i just heard while watching the U.S. open: "Boy they have really trimmed it well, this has got to be the tightest hole in the Open."
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
he even offered to make my bed in the morning.
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
She kept telling the ambulance to sit down and then started crying when we told her it couldn't hear her
all i wanna do is drink skittled vodka, fuck my gf, and pass out in my neighbors hot tub naked
I would rather get explosive diarrhea at the aquarium than go home alone tonight
I fucking hate you. Some slutty looking drunk chick backed her ass up across the bar and started grinding on you. You ignored her because you didn't want to share you drink
I care about my drink far more than her feelings
This reminds me of the time you were crying and puking in the toilet at that party while i did shots of tequila in between blow drying your feet. miss you!
The coast is clear - also, would it bother you if I chose not to wear pants?
He was a foot taller than me and my hands were bigger than his, it's called Pity head
In a few weeks I'll be a beautiful butterfly and me and my cat will have to repopulate the earth. WE WILL REBUILD!!
Stereotypically, lax bros last the longest, but have huge egos that are annoying. Baseball players barely last 10mins, but are really nice. And than we have soccer players, last long and have no egos. Me and my friends have collected our findings.
They tried to get you to drink water and all you kept shouting was, "NO MORE LIQUIDS OF *ANY* KIND."
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