i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
You know you're deprived when the only thing you taste while chewing gum is the 2 grams of sugar alcohol.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
2am update: i think I'm in Mexico but I found a dennys. Everyone but this cute family of 4 is speaking Spanish. Cute family of 4 is helping me out.
you were wandering around the street for like an hour singing "nothing but socks on"..an original you wrote after the 12th shot i believe
I don't know if its because i'm stoned or what but painting my kitchen yellow makes it look crooked
Eh, not fuck buddies. I prefer sexercise partner.
You were screaming across the bar "BUYING US SHOTS ISN'T GOING TO MAKE US STRAIGHT, YA KNOW!!!!!!!!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was a taxi full of fist pumps and chanting to "face down, ass up". It was that 1% that makes my job worth it.
I cannot FaceTime with your penis
I just wanna get drunk and watch Tarzan with you is that to much to ask?!?
And that is why I love you so much. You have the same cold black heart as me.
I had the choice between 9 burritos and 1 girl...
And...?
just bought safety googles to wear so he can cum on my face and not in my eye. SAFETY FIRST!
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