Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
Well we ran into the cornfields when the cops got there. We'd been hiding in there for 45 mins when he asks me "So this wasn't exactly how I'd planned this but I thought I'd ask. How do you feel about oral sex?"
Just got the orientation leader spot. For the first two days, I will be one of the best looking guys on campus. The freshman girls will be so disappointed they settled for me when everyone else comes back.
and my loofah got caught on my nipple ring in the shower today. what an awful experience.
He just walked in our room casually and said "big girls are hungry"
knew i was gonna lose at a shoe or be bleeding at some point. and both happened within 20 mins.
I'm not sure which one did it but one of them fucked the kink out of my neck
Remember me drinking the vodka from in between your legs?
I literally just got propositioned by a sugar daddy.
OUR DREAMS ARE BEING REALIZED. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
Hearing them have a conversation is like listening to water buffalo have sex. Awkward and scarring.
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
I puked up my nose. THAT kind of night
I came to the party for him. I don't know where he went, but I mentioned being hungry and his housemate brought me a huge tupperware container of berry cobbler. I think I'll stay.
He called me skinny, I broke his garbage disposal, then denied him sex. Normal second date etiquette.
Randomize
