just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
i don't know whats more disturbing, that his dog drooled directly into my mouth or that i was too drunk and tired to do anything except let it be there.
Reach down the front of your pants and feel around for a while. When you find your balls, leave the library and meet me at the bar.
you started whispering 'the itsy bitsy spider' while you were putting your hands up my shorts.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
Called the cops on a high school party then went in after all the kids ran away and took the rest of the beer. What are you doing tonight?
You know, you have a good excuse now if you have a poor performance. Just say "what do you expect? I took a paintball to the DICK!!"
I have discovered my latent superpower. If a friend is dating a bi chick they will inevitably try and talk me into a threesome.
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Eating a TV dinner and watching Goosebumps on Netflix, the sad, sad title of my autobiography.
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
he really is such a sweet guy. it’s a shame i have to break his heart.
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
I just smoked part of an Oreo cuz I thought it was some hash you left
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