yay, now i'm not the only homewrecker.
yeah but i stopped sleeping with him after i found out he was married.
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
I think vodka calistinics prior to and during beer olympics was a bad idea
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
Did you know even strippers have to have GED's these days??
just went back to the bar and asked if they found a shoe last night.
I'm also 95% sure I had a conversation with someone on how hard it would be to jerk off with out opposable thumbs
I said to him "i can't have sex with anyone in my friend's living room" then he said "we can move the air mattress into the kitchen"
If you need to be the damsel in drunken distress make sure it's before 3.
I feel like it went downhill once I decided we should take $100 tequila shots.. oops lol
being single and having a boyfriend 300 miles away is eerily similar. never skipped a beat eating hot wings in my bed with no pants or masturbating every day.
I love this text stream: discussing the development of a business model centered around cooking acid to bankroll a yacht trip in Croatia
I just licked wine off my own thigh. I've hit a new low.
I woke up to the smell of shame and vomit in my hair... went to the bathroom to shower and passed out... woke back up naked with the blow dryer on... thanks for making my birthday a success
I had a date last night. His dog threw up in his bed while we were having sex in it.
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