he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
Standing in line for a prescreening of Alice in Wonderland - guy just passed out cold in front of us - first drug overdose of the Alice in Wonderland phenomenon witnessed.
I should have but it might be too early in this fuckbuddyship to emasculate him
Just got booked to do a bachelorette party for a polygamist wedding. And notice I only text you to rub things in your face and show you my life shits on yours. Daily.
I fucked her and then she made me sleep on the floor next to her bed because she 'has a committment problem'
After a certain blood-alcohol level, the dog is in charge.
When I come over I'm bringing "Socky" the Alcoholism Prevention puppet, today he is going to tell you boys about his FAVORITE word---its called "moderation"
when you agree to fuck a guy it does by NO means make it okay for his roommate to hide in the closet with doritos and watch
We can add pilot to the list of people who's lives I've changed...with my penis.
i'm exhausted. do you know how hard it is to put together an outfit that is professional enough to secure a babysitting job yet slutty enough to let him know i'm down for sex during naptime?
So bored. I think I've expelled every last gram of jizz from my body.
Definitely went down on him last night while he was wearing a cape. He randomly kept swirling it around me and "revealing me" in the mirror like a magic trick. I'm not even a little upset, it's fun fucking younger guys.
I just saw elmo dancing with gumby. The bars at 7a.m. are AWESOME.
I yelled at your uterus for you.
Randomize
