somebody snuck up and got me drunk
I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
eat the baked goods on the counter at your own risk... i made them while i was angry and drunk so they most likely have pubes in them
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
How do you feel about fucking me quick and then me leaving to go do arts and crafts?
You picked up her frozen vom puddle and threw it like a frisbee.
she stopped traffic so I could crutch across the street. Clubbing while crippled and drunk is different.
Thanks for being my pregnancy scare Sherpa...
What can I say I sleep with 40 year old Cougars because my mother gave me away at birth and apparently that's why says my therapist
She stopped me mid sex to ask if she could finish my ramen, I've found the one.
Like why am I even still facebook friends with a guy I let finger me at a concert?
I was very impressed with his ability to carry on a conversation with his friends sitting in the front seat with his hand in my pants, getting a hand job, stoned, with a cigarette in his mouth. I think he's a keeper.
Oh god...Did I just fuck a sugar granddaddy?!
There's nothing like a guy talking about your vagina as if it's delicious food to make your day better.
Randomize
