the day after is always just damage control
When I realized it was a dog, and I still had a boner, it was awkward.
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
I am not apologizing for rubbing my balls on your leg...that is a risk you take when you come out to the bar with me
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New discovery: pineapple flavored vodka. Life made, liver in jeopardy. Graduation t-minus 50 minutes.
You made her yell her own name while you were fucking so that you would remember it in the morning.
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
actually there are like 49038098 people in the bathroom for no reason. Singing My Heart Will Go On and pseudo fighting.
So apparently I was a completely different person lastnight, one who drinks scotch and makes out with 55 year old men who look like inspector gadget
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't sleep. My mind keeps asking "turn down for what?" but it won't accept any of my answers.
I found three naked dudes in your bed this morning. Did we have a really weird break in or do you need to tell me something?
If I hear you use the phrase "silky soft scrotum" one more time I swear to God you'll regret it
It's totally a relationship. we have sex in other people's beds, watch mad men while high and get drunk on his teammates' beer. don't you dare stomp on my dreams with your societal judgments
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
because nothing says “let’s fucking rage” like getting a compensation letter and some company stock
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