I have no idea who these bands are he's listening to. If his current playlist was a pandora station, however, it would be titled "music for closet cock gobblers"
He had on juicy sweatpants and thats when i knew he was no longer a threat.
Karaoke makes my soul die one wretched song at a time
I just had the ultimate walk of shame. I'm barefoot, in his gym short with vomit in my hair and I walked half a mile through campus. At noon. Thanks for picking up ur phone
she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
Stripper pole. Sore legs. More vaca money.
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
you left me with this keg alone. this is on your hands
I FOUND THE NORMAL CONDOMS. THIS IS GOD TELLING ME TO CHASE AFTER MY DREAM.
Come my child we shall walk thru the pasture of amazing sex and corndogs. Hint:some corndogs are not corndogs.
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
i need to stop meeting underage girls and letting them into the bar. i mean yea its a surefire way to get laid without having to tell them I'm 26 but i feel like as a bouncer I'm focusing on all the wrong things
I was trying to come up with a reason why you shouldn't be naked in front of me, and now I have 'If you give a mouse a cookie" stuck in my head
Randomize
