You got so drunk you kept singing the Sailor Moon theme song and kept making everyone call you Sailor Venus.
he was so drunk he doesn't remember anything. I have to break up with him all over again
I started drinking at 10.30am. Ive got a solid buzz, ive decided holidays are to be treated like gamedays
who the fuck is that kid sitting with you...
I don't have any fucking idea. I woke up and he was there. I'm kinda creeped out.
There are going to be so many Snookis this Halloween that I might just dress as the guy that hit her and punch them all in the face
I'm not going to need your "it doesn't mean you're a slut" pep talk after all.
You are the only one who would stop a bum, tell him to open up, then pour straight vodka in his mouth. You made his year.
I don't want to have to force feed him my vagina!!
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
You were literally hanging out the window and dancing to the remix to Ignition when we drove you home
Geez don't go to a bar for a few days and everyone freaks out.
Oohh. Then yes, he is the Alpha Fuckboy.
One three hour marathon fuck session and now she's divorcing her husband. Should I get business cards made?
I just want you to know you're the worst sister ever.
If this is about me and your ex, it's not my fault she doesn't like men.
Hey, do you know the person who woke me up last night at 1 in the morning yelling and being carried through the courtyard?
That was me Mom...
Randomize
