Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
She's just bitter because she lost all the weight only to discover she doesn't have a pretty face after all.
Mac n' cheese is coming out of my nose. You can't make that feel better
she just threw a smoke bomb in an elevator and ran down 9 flights of stairs to see it at the bottom.
if that blanket by the dog bowl was your dog's "bed" then i apologize to bailey for having sex on it
I may wear a condom to jerk-off tomorrow knowing that my hand has touched surfaces in this bar.
And then he said he would build me a mountain dew water fountain
Marry him now.
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
I'm also sorry that I ate your chicken sandwich while you were throwing up....
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
Is there evidence of another human being getting away with this/ not dying?
Who knew she had talents apart from chugging wine spritzers
I'm concerned I may die tonight. All I've been told about my bday shenanigans is to bring slutty clothes, a bikini, tylenol, sunglasses and pjs. Tell me what the fuck is going on...now
bring lube too
i hate all of you
Randomize
