He said "what's the haps". I don't know what the haps are but there goes his chances
Can you imagine it being physically possible any other way unless the cows are unnaturally flexible
I couldn't remember if it was hamsters or Iraq that you hated. I'm so sorry.
My right boob is officially about a handful while my left is 1 and 3/4 handfuls. I'm staring at the mirror falling into a deep depression.
Hes trying to fuck me on a bear rug. Not saying no.
I just laughed so hard that my back cracked so hard that I thought I was cumming. Magic
No, next time he offers you a ride home, ask him about Batman. The result will always be road head.
Is it completely inappropriate to base my morning after pill purchase on if they sell coffee or not?
Is Oprah even human
He compared my ass to "a 13 year old track star's ass." Umm WTF? Is that supposed to be a compliment? And when I questioned boy or girl he said "either."
Well let me fuck you while I make potatoes. It's every girls dream
I had a dream involving the worlds smallest pony, an asphalt volcano, and jimi hendrix. Never smoking 3 bowls before bed again
was i wearing any clothes at that point?
socks and a thong
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
Is it uncouth to masturbate the night before a gyno appointment?
Randomize
