girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
found your viking helmet in the parking lot this morning, its missing a horn. There was still liquor in the remaining horn. shots from a viking helmet should be mandatory.
Unless you can cure my hangover with your penis I'm not interested.
Dude, they're still mid-coitus. Pretty sure running in to high five my roommate mid-thrust is a mood-breaker.
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture
Hahah what did you even say to him?!
That I was gonna inflate his vagina with a leaf blower?
Oh.
Has my life seriously led me to day drinking on a Monday the third week of the semester?
It's after 5, it's not day drinking.
Did we almost burn down the bar last night? I guess flaming shots were a bad idea.
Remember that time you gave me a fat lip with your vag? We should do that again!
when the repo soundtrack came on in the middle of us having sex i realized it was about time that i clear out my itunes library
What happened to fro yo and sex?
Great... now even my dreams are making fun of me
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
Randomize
