Joe is yelling at the trees again.
Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
I had a nursing patient tell me that her favorite drink was vodka and ensure...called it a colorado bulldog
It was like having sex with a donkey. Everytime she got close she would kick me.
We need to buy some popsicles so we can remind ourselves we're good at this.
Vegas should really enforce the buddy system because if not everyone is going to end up swimming during the water show in front of the Bellagio.
"So you think you can dance" turned into "so you think you can run and slide across the bar"...Jack Daniels wins
also dude totally apologize for the whole drunken "want something in my mouth" text
You tried to pay for our cab with the 2 dollars you got from selling your natty ice outside the strip club.
Dude. If I met a dinosaur right now. we'd totally be on the same page. Brainwaves and shit.
she stole my Timberlands and my Sublime shirt and left her heels and bra. this is war
Apparently I came into our room and told her that there should be a zipline from our window to Walgreens so that I could get chicken noodle soup
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
Only you would make Mario Party a contact sport.
And you owe me a new pair of switch controllers.
Randomize
