are u sure the monkey wasnt drunk too
I told him it was like a man's penis, but smaller.
Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
A guy in a sombrero stopped to take a picture with me sitting on the curb.
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
the only thing you and i have in common is the we like weed and looking at my naked body.
I think we should go through the tsa checkpoint with raging hardons when we go through LAX. I think we should pass out some viagra to everyone
Yup. We're now banned from TWO of our nation's finest zoos.
At the end of the night i was really thirsty and tied to a bedpost
No. We can't get pedicures until my toenails grow back.
I'll get tired halfway through and end up passed out at a taco shack honestly
He's been pretending to be gay for 3 months in order to get free weed.
I'm pretty sure the Bible says "He who is most sober may cast the first stone."
I’m home.
I’m aware. I just dropped you off.
Randomize