His facebook says he is a fan of "underwater handjobs"
i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
i feel like his penis is a security blanet. i cant fall asleep unless its in my hand
And when we woke up we made beer pancakes. Great start to a family picture day.
DDing is such a bittersweet job, just got the entire history of this girls hookup career
He fell off the roof... he clearly has not been preparing for summer.
I love you, but you should know I'll always ditch you for weed.
I love it. Like, more than my penis at the moment.
Wtf man. I knew she was bad news. No sane person cares if you eat their raviolli.
Would it be weird if I congratulated the guy who almost broke up my marriage for working on the marriage equality bill? You know, thanks for fighting for the sanctity of marriage. Weird, right?
also, sleeping with your chipotle guy sounds like a good idea until you want chipotle on your day off and have to look somewhat presentable to acquire said chipotle.
I literally just skipped to the fridge when I realized we had enough vodka left to get day drunk
He's like a computer from 2001 in a 2014 world. It just doesn't work. Lots of glitches.
The only words I could make out were "Dicksmash McIroncock".
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
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