I just poured my flask into a drink. Then I realized the drink belonged to the guy next to me so I stole it from him. He confronted me and I made out with him to distract him. When I looked up, I realized his wife was watching. Its barely 10:00.
does dane cook know its not 2004 and that hes no longer relevant?
She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
Can you deep fry cheerios do you know? crucial question
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Mission get my tooth back and find a new dick to ride starts after i sleep for the first time in 2 days.
Give him a trash can and a welcome home balloon, he will be good.
CHEMICAL ENGINEER. God my mom would be so proud of me.
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
1. My arms are cement 2. I wish dogs could answer the phone
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just walked out topless, stared his brother straight in the eye, and ate all the rest of their cookie dough.
After we had sex he told me it was a "goodbye gift". We haven't talked since.
Yes, bail money means jail. It also means lie to dad, do it now.
ive decided that just saying "yes" when people assume I am something other than Caucasian will highly benefit my love life. last night I was native.
the puppy had a little leather gag and was using a ball gag as a fetch toy
You should probably come home from vacation now. I make badddd decisions when you're gone.
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