I'm so never shaving my vag in a target bathroom for him again.
Have you come up with a team name for the beer pong tournament on Saturday?
We can be the stepdads. If anyone asks why say because we beat you and you hate us.
i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
I'm not sending you pictures to jack off to. That's not what friends do
If I don't have hickies that last till tuesday, I didn't do this weekend right
my cat just photo bombed my nudie.. does this qualify me as a cat lady?
So this bar tattoo not looking that great now
i think we watched the dark knight rises after you left but i might have passed out through most of it. I remember crying at the end though. sad tears then happy tears.
I finally figured out how to tighten my bra straps and I feel like a god
He keeps singing a song about someone called the dayman.
....fighter of the Nightman?
I got a pots and pans set and a vibrator. Merry Crisis.
Because of you I can never eat chicken nuggets without thinking of you fucking him. I hope youre happy. I really do.
This is getting exciting. I almost wanna turn off all the lights, get some popcorn, and stare at my phone screen to see if she's going to say yes or not
And on a much sadder note, I'm way to drunk for this right now
Randomize
