He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
I mean I can't believe yesterday ended w/ your house getting firebombed. What an unexpected turn of events
I often get tempted to walk up to her drunk ass and say, "shouldn't you be taking care of your kid?"
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
is year to celebrate how much I love you, I made a mosaic of your penis with conversation hearts. it's in your mailbox.\n\nHAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY TO YOU
How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
Accidentally hit on the same girl twice at the bar, she give me her number both times though so I think its cool.
They were loudly fucking last night and there was way too much conversation involved. It wasn't even dirty talk, it was more like "your doing it wrong" talk
If you have shit your pants within the past two years, please take a seat.
We got back from the bar and started watching bizzare foods, which subsequently led to the consumption of large amounts of rancid lunch meat and small insects.
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
Turns out he's not a Doctor Who fan, I mumbled Alons-y as I went down on him. He asked who Alan was. No more drunk sex for me!
Don't make me do math I'm drunk and full of chicken
She did NOT find it funny to come upstairs to find me with the word "MISERY" written on my forehead in magic marker and the label to the vodka bottle replaced with a scrap of paper taped around that says "COMPANY"
I came twice AND he sent me home with edibles. I think he’s a keeper.
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