i just fingered the ice cream at home instead of getting a spoon
been there done that
Woke up on the floor holding a sandwich. Shots. Never again.
Suuuuuuper drunk and just sang fuck her gently to the chiminea. I'm in bad shape.
We found her on the trampoline. She told us she was jumping so she could puke & rally. I think I want to marry her.
If this week is any indication of my life here I've got to get out ASAP. My liver can't hack it.
dude this night sums up my single life. naked, crying, and covered in honey. i need to get laid.
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
No later than 4:00 ok - I'm tying my viagra high into a superbowl halftime showstopper. Ya, you might wanna look away for that
Aw don't be embarrassed. It was all good fun! We've all been there. You can't come to vegas and NOT get a little alcohol poisoning. That's like going to church and not praying.
SKIIIIIIIIIIII, trip mo foes! Let-ith the epic- ness begin ith. Heroes go forth, nAy Sayers fuckin die. This is for the good of mankind! See you on the morrow
Apologies to the number who did not expect to get this but certainly be jealous of us.
currently googling "apology gifts for when you poop on their floor"
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
I think I may have just hit a new slutty low! ..... Just purchased the Costco pack of condoms... $9.99/48 pack = amazing deal! The judgement when I bust out the value pack = priceless!!!
we need to open a bar. a bar with... wait for it... A FUCKING BALL PIT.
LOL. Do you guys need a ride home?
No. we're home already. i just thought it was a brilliant fucking idea.
We need a kiddie pool and lots of cornstarch
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