this kid down the hall keeps banging on his drums...i feel like i'm living in jumanji
and then she said I drew a line on her forehead with my cum and whispered "Simba"
He toold me that when we were younger I was his boner buddy.
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
He fucked a visibly pregnant girl. It doesn't get weirder than that.
Playing basket ball at the park with random people that showed up at 1am. the division of teams is based on what drugs people are on
How's your threesome situation going?
Optimistic
All I can remember is posting my chicken burger in the post box. Postman is in for a treat.
I need to stop acting like a drunk bitch. People are going to get the right idea about me...
They were arguing about who would hit the piñata first so naturally you tore it open with your hands. You broke the piñata and their hearts.
I called him a "Beautiful Bastard" with "Beautiful Bastard Hair". That is how you pick up a guy from Denmark.
We can't go out this weekend. My uterus is so desperate it's given me permanent beer goggles
I woke up with a bunch of jolly ranchers and an eight ball in my purse. Successful
i'm at work, alone, drinking a spiced chai & fireball hot toddy. holiday OT isn't that bad after all.
Randomize
