I feel like ignoring a facebook event is a lot like a pocket-veto. The only difference is instead of opposing legislation, I don't want to go to your sketchy party.
apparently i peed in my fridge last night because my vegetable drawer was filled with it.
Best news ive heard all week. The cougars r coming! The cougars are coming!
Looking at the victoria's secret website makes the ice cream I'm eating taste like sadness and obesity
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Cumming on a girls face is guy code for you're not wife material.
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
Apparently my downstairs neighbors don't much appreciate it when I do drunk aerobics at 3am on a Wednesday...
Well the strippers have danced to goo goo dolls and green day, time of your life. Were all gonna commit suicide.
Wonderful brian is stoned out of his mind, floating in a lawn chair in the hot tub eating a giant plate of macaroni and staring at the moon
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You screamed "there will be blood" and punched some random guy in the face. So no, we can't go back to that bar.
I just found out who gave her jelly shots. You owe me a new mattress.
You just gave me the title for the series of our lives. Haha. Chapter 12: the cocaine on the back of the hairbrush
Safe to say we should stock up on nipple bandaids ladies
But did u die
I found an onion in my purse
You made the lady who made your cheeseburger sign the box so that when she got famous you would have her autograph.
Randomize