Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
I tried to throw up out of my window but I forgot there was a mesh screen.
and then she judged me for using my bra as a potholder. hard times my friend, welcome to college.
she's living proof man. somebody has literally pissed in the gene pool
Dude sorry but it totally wasn't worth going back in there for yous shoes
I have a busted ear drum from when he honked his horn when we started to have sex on his car in the parking lot...
How external is "for external use only"?
No memories of receiving this. Or of getting home. Or of apparently developing a taste for marmalade, which I assume is yours because I have literally never eaten it before. It's all over the kitchen. And my phone. And in my hair. Oh god I wish I wasn't on the train to work. X And sorry about the kitchen x
It wasnt until i started dancing that i realized i pissed myself dude. I dont think shes gonna call me back.
She's 90% sass and 10% boobs
Next time I take edibles I'm getting chipotle to cater the event
Another guy on Tinder just asked about "the hotter girl" in my pictures. I fucking hate being your friend.
this is a PSA to never have sex in a bed from ikea
Smoking weed with a blind guy, don't worry he's chill.
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
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