I'm drinking ghetto ass mojitos!
Wow. How can mojitos be ghetto?
Squirt + bacardi limon + limes = ghetto mojitos
My wife says its no good to have oral sex during pregnancy. So i guess pregnancy is like regular life.
Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
We were so tired we rock paper scissored for who would be on top. I won.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
As per my father's affair, married men are no longer off limits.
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
I am NOT getting arrested in a wig.
I'm wearing red that night.
Noted, what shade?
Whore.
I'm just glad you're the only person I can have a "remember when we thought I was pregnant" conversation with.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing says "Good Morning" like Jell-o shots and coffee cakes.
There was a tour on campus today, and there were two girls i went to high school with in the group. They saw me and ran up to me as i was unlocking my door. when i opened it, kate was laying in a pile of glitter and beer cans. We need to reevaluate.
i'll llet you know if at any point this night starts to make any sense
He literally named all the parts of the vagina as he fingered me. No more pre-med virgins.
Do you remember me asking for jerk off videos from Tinder guy?
Nah I don't remember that being part of the criteria
You cannot ask her to resend the picture of her genital tattoo to you just so you can show your room mate. it is time to end your relationship with the Captain.
Randomize