I just woke up in bed with 4 girls. Either i dont remember the best night of my life or they think im gay.
Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
he believed the zit on my nose was a piercing...until he tried to bite it. needless to say he didnt ask for my number
it was like one of those moments where the couple runs together and kisses and everyone in the airport claps. but instead of clapping an indian guy walked by and said 'ahhhright! get some!'
i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
I just walked by a party bus on my way to study. God hates me.
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
Yeah well my vagina has expectations too but they don't get met all the time.
I'm mad at him and disappointed with you. It's like I put a bunch of effort into a PowerPoint of "what not to do with Zach" to show you and the first bullet point was "do not love him" and you're just disregarding all my effort and friendship.
I have to make mistakes myself to learn from them
FUCK YOU I AM MAKING A POWERPOINT
She just broke into my apartment while I was asleep, woke me up and drunkenly tried to seduce me for about 2 minutes, then passed out..
I don't want my vagina anymore.
The bar tender had his entire hand down your asscrack.
I forgot about that. I was in MULTIPLE dimensions.
The kitchen also doubles as a screaming room after midnight as long as you have something to muffle the sound
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
Randomize
