Walk of Shame time yet?
Dude she's 6"2, blonde and on the cheerleading team. I look like Seth Rogen's fatter, unfunny brother. What shame am I supposed to be feeling?
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
I never thought to pass out in a hotel lobby rather then paying for a hotel room until you taught me that's acceptable at the Hilton
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
What did you give her? She's trying to tape her wrists so her hands don't fall off.
He ate me out like a beaver on a tree. I've never been so scared in my life
They ran out of toilet paper, so I had a girl rip down the streamers so I could wipe.
As soon as he came we went to Dairy Queen. That drive through lady was very condescending about our "just fucked" ice cream.
This guy at the airport was telling me 3/4 dudes in his group got rufied at some strip club. One guy woke up in the hospital, another found himself in a random parking garage, the other got back to the room and they all shit their pants. Go Vegas.
"my nose is broken but I'm beer pong champ so it evens out really"
Got 2 free lines of blow from some random guys on the side of 13th street.....how's your Sunday going?
I think I just got suckerpunched by a 14-year-old.
I threw my back out having sex last night. I don’t know whether to high five myself for a job well done or cry because I’m old.
Why in the hell is there a guy dressed up as a horse passed out in our kitchen.
happy birthday!
In hindsight I shouldn't have been blasting Antichrist Superstar if I didn't want to seem suspicious driving up to a Catholic church
Randomize
