you still trying to smash that chick?
it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober
But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
After she came with my hands around her neck, she sat there for a minute and gave me the scuba diving sign for a-ok.
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
You could say the cab driver was less than excited when we called his personal cell phone at 4am for directions back to our hotel after having blacked out at the club
they just started filling water ballons with vodka.
on my way.
bong water from a few floors above me just splashed onto my face when i was looking out the window. Happy 4/21 to me
He just texted me asking if I remember pinching his eyelid shut with my eyelash curler.
I happen to have lost a black t-shirt and the volume button from my phone last night. If anyone finds it. You know what to do.
this night just went from meh to biblical thanks to drunk naked yahtzee
i need to stop meeting underage girls and letting them into the bar. i mean yea its a surefire way to get laid without having to tell them I'm 26 but i feel like as a bouncer I'm focusing on all the wrong things
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
"They let me see the x-ray. My nose is broken. I saw it. It was cool. Well, I guess it would be cooler if it wasn't my nose."
So he has moved up to a stage 5 clinger...Surprised he didn't try to lure you into bed with tacos, like he did last time
Yeah... akward. I don't want a round 2
Just met my future wife. Please dont fuck her.
Randomize
