things it involved: vodka, boy parts, possible photos of me on a cell phone. things it did NOT involve last night: my bra, his pants, and sobriety.
Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
I'm trying to pinpoint the moment when "don't do anything I wouldn't do" became bad advise.
So I went tanning and I burned my boobs.
They're like sad pomegranates.
These people don't understand my stages of drunk
The bad news is I fucked my exes girlfriend. The good news is I100% understand why he left me
Good, be his mentor. Like a tiny gay Yoda.
She knew the head wasn't all that so she gave me her taco. I'm will in to give her a second chance.
- I'm finally learning to be functional when I'm high. I feel like this is a milestone.
She turned down sex for beer pong. I'm not sure if I should be disappointed or not.
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
I trusted a fart in Toronto. NEVER TRUST A FART IN TORONTO.
he literally walked in took a shit and left ringing the 'great service' bell on the way out.
It was bad. U were calling my cat "kittiano" and playing her like a piano. Way too drunk my friend.
Randomize
