I just bought Christian paraphenilia at Borders for my dad's bday. I had the urge to tell them it wasn't mine, like I was buying laxatives or a dildo
Hahahaha. You probably would have been more comfortable buying either of those than what you just bought
as nice as a boyfriend sounds, a relationship would require morals and self-restraint - both fields in which i lack.
momma always taught us never to change for a boy..
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
She kept screaming "best case scenario"
I need input, can I pre-game my cat scan?
I didn't hate myself when I woke up today, that's improvement right?
HELP A SISTER OUT. AND KEEP YOUR TONGUE OUT OF THE HUMMUS.
TOO HIGH TO FIGURE THIS SHIT OUT
You should photoshop their heads on tigers first!!
For my parents' annivery card? How high are you?
i snuck out to taco bell in my hospital gown earlier
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
Of course I'm using oj as a mixer, its flu season.
For a man with no legs he was surprisingly good at doggy style.
I don't know whether to high-five you or stage an intervention.
See and now you're talking. I am like the fairy godmother of hook ups.
I wanna riverboat gamble on your vaginal waters. Just sayin
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
Randomize