Good news! Whoever used this stall at Target earlier...not pregnant!
Call me "white mamba"
Your dick is not a dangerous deadly poisonous snake
It is white.
i just farted in a meeting....took me completely by surprise.
so you made the shocked face and they caught you.
yup.
yeah. pants. i need to put pants on. i didn't do that last night. big mistake
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
It wouldn't have been a big thing. If anything, I woulda apologized to you and cleaned the remote
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
one of the RAs is here. he told me his name is optimus prime and then took his shirt off and fell down
he got all sad that i was going to fuck his roommate, so i just asked him if it would make him feel better if I let him motor boat me. i am such a saint.
I took her to the bar and boom. All of my past slump busters were there. Shes cool enough to know what that means and said she was afraid they'd eat her so we left.
I think people like me is why alcohol became illegal at one point
do me a favor, I need this weekend off so can you work your magic and blow my boss again?
Don't go to jail over some guy named Bunky
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
The fact that you cheered yourself on while you puked saying it was your first college puke, blacked out, and sang taylor swift to the toilet confirms the fact that we are related. I've never been more proud.
Randomize
