I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
i just carried on a conversation with my mother from another room mid-ejaculation. you would have done the same
You would only drink if the space jam soundtrack was playing, you thought it was hilarious that before every shot you said "y'all ready for this".
This got awkward about two "Oh yeah"s ago.
Hooked up with my first aid and cpr teacher last night. She dressed as a lifeguard and brought me back to life. Beat that.
you were crying while pretty ricky was playing, what did you want me to do
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
Im in your car brotha dog. Its was unlocked, so im gonna sleep in it. well i mean i think its your car be your car.
He told me I was a pleasure to arrest. That's the 2nd time I've heard that.
I'm gonna drop in for a zip later man. It made me wanna eat my girls shampoo. Good shit
Whenever I'm hungover I try to stay in public as much as possible, hoping to be a cautionary tale to children. It's a public service, really.
He even wore it to bed. What the hell. He's too excited about that goddamn costume.
Allow me to explain. Triple D is a surprise. It's like if you're expecting to fight one person, then you get ambushed by more. Except it's a good ambush, because it's boobs, not death.
shit i just threw up on a freshman
i don't know if i should laugh or feel bad..
nevermind it was a sophmore, laugh.
Randomize
